Be Survivors!

I have a question for you: if you have kids, do they yell at you? 

I used to believe that all kids yell (because mine do), but when I was talking to my friend recently, I discovered not all kids yell at their parents. I was giving this friend an illustration, and I started, “It’s kind of like when your kids yell at you . . .”

My friend looked at me with bewilderment, “Your kids yell at you?”

I looked back at him with more bewilderment, “Your kids don’t yell at you?” 

He just shook his head. I went on with my illustration, but I’m not sure it was impactful. Now, I’m not saying there are not consequences in our house for yelling. I’m just saying we have yet to find the secret one that stops it. Because, I got yelled at this morning. Two times in fact!

The first time it was because apparently last night, I mentioned that I might make eggs in the morning. Instead, this morning, I served oatmeal. 

“How can I trust you?! How can I trust you if you don’t do what you say you will do?!” was shouted at me.

Brian got a big kick out this, so he jumped in too (totally tongue-in-cheek), “I mean really, Mommy! How could you?! You say you’re making eggs, and then, you make oatmeal?! I just cannot believe you would do this!” (We’re trying a humor parenting strategy this week.)

Later, I was walking out the door to walk the twins, who were running late, to school. Alex suddenly decided he needed something, and he ran back in the house. Well, if Gabe and I didn’t get started walking, Gabe was going to be late, so off we went. Once Alex came back out of the house and didn’t see us waiting, he started yelling at me. Now, all our neighbors now know that some kids yell at their parents. 

I was reading in Matthew 10 this morning out the The Message version of the bible. Several of the things that Jesus says there really struck me. 

The first was from verses 29-31, “. . . don’t be intimated by all this bully talk.” 

That was a good reminder for me this morning after being yelled at. Now, of course, Jesus was not talking about the Stephens kids. However, it requires a lot of staying grounded in my identity in Christ to not yell back at my kids or to not take their anger personally. The calmer I am in those situations, the better it is for my kids. I realize more and more how much I need that posture in life, in ministry, and in being on mission. 

I need to be so rooted in Christ that what others think does not rattle me. That doesn’t mean that we are not supposed to have emotion. But Christ was basically telling his disciples that people were not going to like them! 

“When people realize it is the living God you are presenting and not some idol that makes them feel good, they are going to turn on you, even people in your own family. There is a great irony here: proclaiming so much love, experiencing so much hate! But don’t quit. Don’t cave in. It is all well worth it in the end. It is not success you are after in such times but survival. Be survivors!"

I hope that’s an encouragement to you today. In whatever you are facing, don’t focus so much on your’s or other's ideas of success. Be survivors! 

Miracle Morning?

I realized recently that I have only blogged once since this guy was born. He's almost one.

Last night, I was reading through past blog posts, and I started to get a little sad that I haven't been documenting our life, for my own sake. It was so fun to go back and read little stories (mostly about the kids). So I said to myself, "Self, it's time to start blogging again."

Here goes. This morning I was doing some menu planning and was surfing Pinterest for inspiration. I came across a pin that said-the perfect college morning, with a link to an article: "Miracle Morning". I actually clicked on it because I could use some miracle mornings. I'm not bothering to link the article because it was kind of silly and not that profound. 

That got me thinking about my morning, and what defines a miracle morning for me. For my own record, so I can read this post in a few years and chuckle, this was my morning:

5:30am: Alarm goes off. I am trying folks. The hope is that I wake up before all the kids, shower, get dressed, put on my make-up, get breakfast ready for the kids, and then sit in a chair with a cup of coffee, read my bible, and journal for just a few minutes before the crazy starts. Reality, this morning? I hit snooze until 6:20am!

6:20am: Pop out of bed, throw on clothes, put hair back into a ponytail, start the coffeemaker, get breakfast ready.

6:40am: Go into Cece's room, turn on lamp, rub her back (a new strategy that seems to soften the wake-up blow).

6:45am: Big boys wake up on their own. The one morning this week that they could sleep until 7:15am, they are up. Alex is complaining already, and he tries to go eat breakfast without getting dressed first.

7:00am: Alex and Gabe are wrestling in their bedroom. I tell them it is time to get dressed.

7:05am: Alex is not happy about the pants that he chose the night before. I make a fatal (I mean fatal) tactical error and tell him he can choose a different pair of pants. 

7:10am: Gabe is still trying to wrestle with Alex. I institute a new system. Gabe does not get to watch the Friday night movie unless her earns 5 points.

7:12am: I am answering way too many questions about the new point system!

7:15am: Cece is heating up her second muffin in the microwave, but I tell her she doesn't have time to eat it.

7:16am: Alex wants Cece to pass him a knife; Cece freaks out! The new 5 point system now includes Cece. In order for her to earn a point, she has to do something nice for her brothers. She does two things immediately following the institution of the system that do not earn her points.

7:20am: Alex is cold. I tell him that perhaps he should choose long-sleeve shirts instead of t-shirts, and then he might not be so cold. He decides he wants a long-sleeve shirt right then. I think to myself that I shouldn't talk so much.

7:25am: Cece and I go outside to wait for her ride. (Bless our friends who carpool with us.)

7:26am: Cece reminds me that she needs money for her lunch. I run inside grab my wallet and run back out with money.

7:30am: Gabe has brushed his teeth and is reading books because he wants a point.

7:40am: Alex has not brushed his teeth, and he is now wearing his third shirt of the morning.

7:43am: I tell Alex enough is enough, and that he must choose between the two shirts he was already wearing.

7:45am: Our babysitter arrives. Eli is still sleeping despite the previous Cece freakout.

7:46am: Alex is still wearing the third shirt. I skip all point systems and just tell him that he will not watch a movie tonight if it is that important to him to wear the third shirt.

7:47am: Alex is still whining. I just repeat the same words more slowly and more clearly. He cries, but says he wants to watch the movie, so he goes to change his shirt.

7:50am: Gabe is outside with his jacket, hat, gloves, and backpack because he wants a point.

7:52am: Alex is still whining, but he has on a different shirt, and I am helping him put his two sweatshirts on. Yep, he chooses to wear two sweatshirts instead of a jacket. 

7:55am: Alex suddenly stops whining and says, "I'm sorry mommy." We walk to the garage together.

Miracle morning? I think so!

(This is Alex a few weeks ago. No pics of him this morning. Never occurred to me to take one.)

the fourth child

In the first 21 days of Cece's life, we posted 20 times on this blog!! Eli is three months old, and I haven't posted one photo of him. When he was a few weeks old, Daniel, who serves on the JV creative communications team came over to take some family photos, and he also took some pics of Eli.

Sweet boy is the fourth child, so he doesn't get 20 posts, but he sure is cute!

ready (or not) for baby number four

I am 37 weeks pregnant with our baby boy (yep, it's a boy). Our twins were born at 34 weeks, so we are happy to have made it this far. Much of our weekends these past two months was spent painting rooms, refinishing furniture, and moving stuff around our house to get ready for this little guy's arrival. I think we're ready. To be honest, I have had fear that Number Four (we'll give him a name when he arrives) will limit my capacity. When our boys started preschool last January, I began to increase my involvement and expand the ways I serve in JV and in our community. A few months later, I found out I was pregnant. The truth is, my capacity will be limited, for awhile. However, this week, Brian and I had dinner with Dave and Connie Patty, and they helped us to think practically about ways I can be involved, use my gifts, and serve JV in the next few years. This conversation meant a ton to me personally. Also, I recently finished reading The Great Divorce by C. S. Lewis. After finishing the book, I began to pray and share with God all the emotions I was feeling, a lot regarding having four kids. As I was praying, I got a picture in my mind of our family of six standing on the edge of heaven (much of the imagery came from the book). I saw Brian, myself, Cece, Gabe, Alex, and this little toddler boy bounding through a field toward these mountains where heaven awaited. Then, I heard the Spirit say, "This baby is eternal." In these next few months, I so desire to keep eternity and Christ's Kingdom in mind. fall conference This year was JV's biggest fall conference ever, with close to 300 young leaders attending from 13 different European countries. I still remember when Brian told me, "I think there are going to be 300 people at this conference!" Because he carries a lot of details, he had excitement and a little fear in his eyes as he said it! The first challenge was figuring out where they would even put 300 people for the sessions. The solution was a semi-permanent tent that our conference center added to their facility a few weeks before the conference started.  300 young leaders gathered in what ended up being a pretty sweet tent to receive training on how Christ modeled discipleship and how to multiply your ministry. One of the first times I was trained in this material, ministry according to the life of Christ, was by Dan Hash in 2002 at JV intern training. I remember thinking:this is so good; why don't all ministries just study Christ and how he did ministry?  Amy Nickerson did a great job of blogging on the JV website about the conference. Check out her Now That the Conference is Over blog for a great summary. JV's 20th anniversary This year, JV is celebrating its 20th anniversary. During Fall Conference, one of the evenings was dedicated to a celebration of all that God has done in Central and Eastern Europe through JV in these past 20 years. (Read more about it on Connie's blog.) While I wasn't apart of JV 20 years ago, I did start serving short-term with JV in 1998. I also lived with the Hashes in the summers of 2002 and 2003 where I had the privilege of hearing a lot of stories from those early years. 20 years ago, two families, the Pattys and the Hashes, took a step through an open door to do Kingdom work in a part of the world where the church was almost dead. They just came. They didn't always know exactly what they were doing, but they did one of the most brave things that anyone I know has ever done. I'm just walking in the path they paved. Here's a video that shows the fruit of that bold beginning. More people in this part of the world now know Jesus. To be even a small part of that is truly an honor. Changing Lives from Josiah Venture on Vimeo.

triumphant and cracked pot parenting

Yesterday morning was one of those mornings in our house when you wonder if anything you are doing as a parent is working! You're not sure whether to cry, scream, or laugh at how terrible your kids are acting. (Don't they look cute in the dinosaur's mouth? Maybe the dinosaur should eat them!)

I awoke yesterday morning 10 minutes before my alarm went off to Cece yelling at us from her bed about how mad she was that she was wearing a pull-up. Cece still wets the bed, and while we've made great progress in the past few weeks, the night before she had peed, so we stripped her sheets and put a pull-up on her to get her through the rest of the night.

I purposefully set my alarm for a half-hour before our kids wake up/need to get woken up to get ready for preschool. That gives me time to make breakfast for them and have it ready to go when they come to the kitchen dressed for the day, and it gives me time to make coffee. I think the fact that I make breakfast and have it ready for them is pretty darn awesome; however, they don't seem to always grasp the awesomeness.

I laid in bed and ignored the attack until my alarm went off. I don't parent well until I've had a cup of coffee, so I decided to ignore the malice coming from down the hall and stumbled into the kitchen.

Brian woke the boys up about 30 minutes later. Cece made it to the kitchen table, and with my coffee cup in hand, I proceed to explain how crazy it was for her to be saying such things to two gracious parents who had helped her the night before, and how next time she pees on herself, she could deal with the mess herself! That seemed to clear that up, for the time being.

Alex made it to the kitchen and climbed up to his breakfast, only to complain about what had been prepared for him. After several minutes of whining, he was escorted back to his bedroom. Gabe came out about that same time wanting help with his jeans when I noticed that he hadn't changed his underwear. I told him to put clean underwear on, which incited a fit of outrage. How dare I make such a request?! Well, we go to school with clean underwear in this family; I'm sorry! Gabe was also escorted back to his room, and he never made it to the breakfast table that morning, missing out on what I thought was a fabulous yogurt parfait.

Two of the three kids were crying when Brian left the house with them at 7:50am. I, funny enough, had language at 8am that morning, so I needed to get out the door at that same time too, with real clothes on ready to learn language. I somehow managed to leave the house at 7:54am.

As I walked to language, I wrote Brian a text that said, I'm so sorry, thinking of him dragging crying kids into preschool.

He sent me a text a short time later that said he brought each kid into preschool separately. I guess one of the teachers asked him if things were okay. He said, "We've had one of those mornings!"

After I got home from language, I began formulating a plan for the evening after I picked the kids up from preschool: extra chores, no shows, early bedtime. And a plan for the next morning: assigned seats at the table, no choices about breakfast, I choose the chores, what you don't eat at breakfast becomes dinner, etc. I was ready for battle!

Funny enough, I picked up angels from preschool yesterday; I mean, angels. A good report from the teacher about the day. Cooperation like you wouldn't believe about the extra chores. Pure delight in the dinner that I made (something new even that everyone tried with excitement). We had a family meeting to discuss the following morning, and all kids went to bed with limited drama! It was like night and day!

This past Tuesday, we had what is now being called the international teams' bible study. Those who are on a team that serves all of JV make up the iteam. Dave lead our bible study from 2 Corinthians (photo credit to Connie; click here to read her post for more about the bible study).

Together, we charted the characteristics from the verses that describe our lives as followers of Christ that are triumphant and those that show we are cracked pots. We talked about how, because of Christ, we are triumphant in all that we do, but that we have these treasures in jars of clay; therefore, we are afflicted, but not crushed; preplexed, but not driven to despair. We are humans living in a fallen world, but by the grace of Christ, we are triumphant!

2 Corinthians is not really talking about parenting, but I am reminded today that I am a cracked pot, Brian is, and so are our kids. We will have mornings like yesterday because I'm a sinner who needs Jesus just like my kids are sinners who need Jesus. However, by the grace of God we are triumphant, and our kids are sometimes angels reminding us of heaven! Whew. What will tomorrow be like?

preschool apps my kids are into

The other day I was texting with my brother, Rollie, about education. (He teases me sometimes about stuff, and I get sucked in.) I was sharing with him about how even though I have a masters degree in literacy, on that day, I had downloaded an app on the iPad, stuck my kids in front of the TV, and mirrored the app onto the TV. I called it learning time.

The funny thing is that ever since, I've seen Cece using some of the concepts she learned from the app to help her read. While screen time is no replacement for actually reading books, I'm finding that some educational apps are engaging to my kids, and they are learning something from them. So, I thought I'd share which ones we're into right now.

Endless Reader
This app introduces sight words. Kids drag the letters of the word to their proper place, and then the word is shown in a sentence with a little animation to illustrate it. It's very interactive, and my kids are into it right now. It's free, but then to unlock most of the sight words, you need to pay. Definitely worth trying out.

Mr. Thorne Does Phonics

I was a bit skeptical about this app. The app is a bunch of videos of Mr. Thorne teaching letter sounds and modeling sounding out words. For some reason (maybe his British accent), my kids are really liking him, and it's helping Cece sound out words in her just right books. It's not very interactive, but hey, if it works.

Starfall Learn to Read

My sister-in-law told me about starfall.com a few years ago. My kids have been using this app for a long time, and I think it's great for learning letter sounds. The little songs that go along with the sounds get stuck in my head even!

guess who's Brian's intern

The summer of 2002, I was a JV intern with Dan and Laura Hash in Poland. It was a very transformational summer for me, and I learned so much about ministry. I spent a lot of time with the Hashes that summer, which included time with their son, Jacob, who was a young boy then.

Now, Jacob is all grown up, and he's about to enter his sophomore year of college. Well, guess whose intern he is this summer? He is Brian's intern. Jacob spent most of his time in a van traveling from country to country visiting Josiah Venture camps shooting footage and doing video editing. (Ironically, I spent a lot of time the summer of 2002 traveling around in a van going from camp to camp.) Jacob is serving on our new Communications Team helping to make videos like this one:


Our 1000th Camp from Josiah Venture on Vimeo.

It seems crazy to me Jacob is now Brian's intern! In addition to Jacob, Amy, who is another grown-up JVK (Josiah Venture kid) is also interning with the Cteam. She has kicked off our jv20 blogs, celebrating JV's 20th anniversary. Read her latest here. Both are doing an amazing job conveying the JV story.

We had them both over for dinner last night. Makes me wonder what those three kids in the middle might be doing 15+ years from now!

my travel companion

Up until I got married, all of my international traveling was with my cousin, Melanie. Heck, most of my traveling in general was with Melanie. Her and I went to Poland together for the first time in 1998, and we visited Prague together in 2002, which was my second summer as a JV intern. A few weeks ago, she came to visit me, and we got to go back to Prague together, just the two of us. What a sweet time it was!

   Here we are in Prague in 2002:

Here we are in Prague a week ago:
Our first two summers in Poland were spent serving with Greg and Heidi Carlson in Torun, Poland. They now live just over the CZ boarder, so Melanie and I were able to go to their house for lunch.

I loved having my travel companion back. Where to next, Mel?

full circle

Here's a picture from the English camp in Poland that Brian and I met at in 2002:

Here's Brian doing at training at this year's Fala (JV's partner organization in Poland) English Camp leader's training:

Turns out one of the campers who was at that English camp in 2002 was at Fala's training in Brian's session. He's now helping his church lead camps:

Things have come full circle.

not your average Sunday

Brian just got home from a trip to the states for the winter JV board meeting and a training for our newly formed and growing communications team. I was home with the kids for nine days (I keep saying ten, but Brian keeps correcting me). The kids were sick while he was gone, and I myself have been sick for more than nine days.

At our church us parents, who send our kids to nursery, rotate Sundays taking turns caring for the kids. Brian and I have done this together several times, and I would say a high average for us is about six or seven kids including our own. So, this Sunday, Brian very kindly offered to do nursery and to let me stay home and rest. I happily agreed, thinking at most, without our boys, he'd have six kids. I kept the boys home with me, and Cece went with Brian to help him.

While he was at church, I got a message from him with this picture. All the message said was 14 kids.

Whooops. Well, we won't be doing that again.

who's at your table

My cousin, Melanie, gave me Bread & Wine: A Love Letter to Life Around the Table for Christmas this year. Author, Shauna Niequist, writes about her life in short essays, most chapters ending with a recipe that coincides with that moment from her life. Even though, I'm not like her, "someone who wakes up in the morning thinking about what I will eat". I am captivated by her writing style, drawn to her honesty about life, and appreciating some new ideas in the kitchen.

One of her points is that one shouldn't worry about achieving perfection before entertaining. Instead, you should just have people over. Regardless of the size of your house, your ability to make tarts, or the chaos of life. Just have people around the table, she implores, because something sacred happens when people are gathered together and nourished together.

To be honest, I have found myself jealous as she's describing the gatherings she has at her table. I get mostly jealous of the times that she has family or long-time friends gathered together. Throughout my high school and college years, my family would gather almost every Sunday after church for dinner (we called it dinner, not lunch) at my aunt and uncle's house. When it was just our two families, the ten of us would crowd around the table. When we invited others, which happened often, we'd set up two tables, if needed. It was a time of joking, sharing, laughing, and eating. Ever since I left Minnesota, I have missed those Sunday gatherings around the table.

Then, when I married into Brian's family, we'd gather together too, but never around one table because 35+ people do not fit at one table. But, often, we'd go to Florida and gather in the living room with Brian's sister's family, kids everywhere (mostly hers), and my glass was never empty. Lots of chaos, but a lot of laughing and a lot of nourishing.

Reading Bread & Wine inspired me. We do have people over for dinner all the time, so this isn't a new thing for me. However, I decided that I wanted this most recent time to be more special. I invited several girls (they are really women, but I still can't call my good friends women--seems weird to me) over for a wine party. I brought out my best dishes and even put on a table cloth. I prepared two things that I know how to make, but that don't really go together--hummus and guacamole. Four of my friends came, two Americans and two Czechs. We sat around my table telling stories of giving birth in Czech hospitals. Tales of trying to speak another language and figure out another culture. Some shared about how they met their husbands. We talked about the local schools and our kids. Two of them shared what they remembered about living here in Czech as small girls during communism.

As I was cleaning up the dishes at midnight (yes, they stayed until midnight!), I realized that "my table" looks different than it did 15 years ago. I still want my brothers and cousins at my table way more than they are able to make it out here to sit at it. However, I'm thankful for this opportunity to have these friends at my table now. I'm not sure what my table will look like 15 years from now, but this is what it looked like last night (before everyone arrived).

our sermon, gender equality, and plagiarism

You may be wondering how in the world our sermon, gender equality, and plagiarism are related. Well, I'll explain. About a month ago, Brian and I preached a sermon at our church here in Czech. I love to preach/teach, but honestly, this was one of the hardest teachings I have ever prepared for. The passage we preached on was Ephesians 5.

One interesting thing is that Brian and I didn't have a lot of conversations about the theology of marriage before we became missionaries. It's not to say that we didn't talk about it or that we didn't live out what we believed, but these past few years have sparked many a late-night conversation on the subject. (Always, completely peacefully, NOT!:))

I'm not sure how things go at your house, but what will start out as a seemingly innocent conversation or question (usually after I've read some blog and want to talk about it) can very quickly become very personal. So, for the past few years, Brian and I have been wrestling with the theology of marriage.

Funny enough, we were asked to preach at our church and the assigned passage was Ephesians 5. So for several weeks before hand, we wrestled some more, read the whole book of Ephesians (more than once), read some books, and stared at our computer screens wondering what in the world we should say. We really prayed about what to share, and I believe that the Holy Spirit gave us some great direction. We do not have this all figured out, but here's the sermon if you're interested. It's translated into Czech. Someday, I hope to able to do something like this without a translator, but that's a few years away.

A few days after we preached, I came across this blog post written by Bill and Lynne Hybels. Bill Hybels is the pastor of Willow Creek in the Chicago area. The post is about a whole lot more than Ephesians 5, hence the gender equality part in my title. I was so touched by this post that I cried. I cried because of their honesty about their struggle to figure out their theology and also the realities of life and how to actually live out what you believe. It's hard. This is an expert from the blog, written by Bill:

"Starting a church proved to be far harder than I had anticipated, so I was insanely busy, and the level of responsibility I carried at a young age produced continual and extreme stress. Anytime Lynne asked me to do even a small thing to help her, I felt burdened and impatient. The fact that I was earning an income to support our family, while her efforts at home as well as in ministry were always unpaid, contributed to devaluing her work. And, of course, because of my visible ministry, I was applauded and honored. Lynne heard again and again how powerfully God was using me. “It’s a good thing Bill has you serving him behind the scenes,” was a comment that repeatedly made her ask, What’s wrong with me? Why am I not content?"

And then, yesterday, I read this post written by Neil Cole, author of Organic Church (and other books) and last year's Josiah Venture Advance conference speaker. The post is part of a five-part series of blog postings in response to a recent plagiarism accusation against Mark Driscoll. (I think Cole references this very respectfully in his initial post.) The fourth post is the one that really convicted me. He talks about how important it is to ask questions and challenge each other's thinking and even question theology. And, this was the most convicting part for me:

"What would Christendom look like if we all agreed, all the time, and no one ever raised a different point of view? Some may say that would be heaven, I think it would be hell. All learning and growing would stop. We'd be monochromatic robots with little beauty or diversity, and we would lack all creativity and surprise. Heaven will be like our Creator who made 10,000's of varieties of flowers and birds, and gave each person a one-of-a-kind DNA so that each one is unique in all of history. Personally, I am grateful for the diversity of opinion. I love people that disagree with me, and those who agree as well. We all can learn from each other. We can discover the rich depth each part of the body brings to the round table if we only humble ourselves and accept one another. Perhaps combinations of thought can produce entirely new realms of understanding."

I like it when people agree with me! I especially like it when Brian agrees with me. However, this whole process of preparing for the sermon we gave a month ago has taught me a lot. And, it's made me appreciate Brian, and I hope to handle it better when we don't agree on theology in the future (hard to imagine that even being possible:)). In the meantime, I am celebrating the conclusions that we came to about marriage, and I was honored to stand next to Brian as we preached.

mission accomplished and an awkward moment at the doctor

Despite the fact that I gave birth to twins here in Czech, had a laser ablation procedure in Belgium, and have lived here in Czech for almost four years, I sadly must admit that I don't like going to the doctor here. This has much more to do with the language barrier than anything else; however it also has to do with these awkward moments, that are usually just cultural differences, nothing wrong on anyone's part, but I'll get to that. I realized this past year that I avoid going to the doctor, a bit too much. So, I made it my goal this summer to get over my fears (and the language barrier, which I'm still working on with Czech lessons four times a week).

One of my goals was to make sure that all five of us got the flu shot. (If you're one that's opposed, please know that I still love you, so still love me too.) For the kids, it meant communicating with our pediatrician early enough, so that she could order it, which is something that I didn't do last year. For me, it meant actually finding a regular doctor. I know, right?! Four years, and I had yet to get a regular doctor. It's just that when I was pregnant with the twins, I was going to a doctor up to two times a week. Finding a regular doctor at that time seemed like a little too much.

So, yesterday, I went to a doctor who speaks English, right in my town, and I was able to get a flu shot (they even had them in stock).

My kids went to their pediatrician yesterday as well to get their flu shots, and Brian got his in the states. I didn't make all the phone calls myself, and I did have a translator with me at the kids' appointment, but still--mission accomplished. So, yes, it's getting easier, but there are still these awkward moments.

First, what you need to know (if you've never been to the doctor here) is that you sort of have to throw modesty out the window. The nurse isn't going to tell you to get undressed and put the rob on, walk out of the room and wait for you to change. In fact, the undressing is going to happen in the doctor's office while the doctor is in there. But, the thing is that I'm never sure when it's supposed to happen. You also won't always get specific directions about what articles of clothing you should take off or keep on, and I certainly don't want to over do it.

So, yesterday, when I was at this new doctor, he was doing a very routine check up, and it all felt very familiar. He checked my throat, asked me to look up and look down, and then, he said he wanted to listen to my heart. Okay, so I'm thinking, this is where the undressing part is probably going to happen. However, I don't want to just assume that, so I wait. He asks me to do something to my shirt (I honestly can't remember, but someone who is not a native English speak doesn't always say those instructions in a clear way), so as to not over do it, I just lifted up my shirt in the back. Then, I thought to myself, he probably wants me to take my shirt off, but I didn't want to just whip it off, so I said, "Is that good?" The hesitation in his answer told me no, so I took it off. That certainly is what he needed me to do because then he said, "There, now I can work!" I'm so glad he was standing behind me so he didn't see my face when he said it. He of course, didn't mean anything by it other than just that--he just wanted to have a good listen to my heart. But oh my goodness, it's those awkward moments that I just have to laugh off!

my ridiculous teacher faces

When Brian and I were first dating, he used to sometimes say, "you're talking to me in your teach voice." It wasn't a compliment. I've gotten better at saving my teacher voice for appropriate times. Sometimes, I whip it out at the dinner table. Wish I had a picture of Alex as he's looking me in the eyes. Well, in addition to my teacher voice, I recently discovered my teacher faces.

This week, I went to H2O, Fala's (Josiah Venture's partner organization in Poland) training facility. I had the opportunity to train some Bethel college students on how to teach English to Polish students. These 20 some college students are communication majors traveling Europe, and they spent three days this week in Polish schools teaching English. This group from Bethel is partnering with four Polish churches who have or are trying to build relationships in their communities with the hope of inviting more students to their youth groups.

Greg Carlson was at H2O, and he snapped some photos from my training. I laughed out loud at myself; you can laugh too!

cece's first day of kindergarten, well kind of

A year and a half ago, I wrote a post about Cece's first day of preschool. Cece has been going to a Czech preschool called Happy Day for a year and a half. I cannot tell you what an answer to prayer this preschool is for us. Not only does Cece speak Czech now, she loves her preschool, her friends, her teachers, and she's learning more than just Czech.

I would wager to say that this is the best preschool in all the Czech Republic. (Have I been to other ones? No, but nonetheless.) A very nice Czech woman in our community had a vision to start a preschool that was student-centered, bilingual, and Montessori. And, while the building is not much to look at on the outside, yet (they are renovating it), inside, students are learning Czech and English, playing with Montessori manipulatives, and learning early literacy skills. Once a week, I teach a lesson there, and I have had a chance to meet with the teachers several times to talk lesson plans, unit outcomes, and what's best for students at this age.

Cece is still four, but this will likely be what they call here her year before school. Then, she'll start first class next year. Czech schools have 13 grades, and students usually start first class when they are six, so that's why it's hard to compare to the idea of Kindergarten. She's attending the same preschool as before, but this is her year before school.

(A little blurry, but Cece with her teacher Oli.)

We love Happy Day!

the best surprise, EVER!

About a month ago, I received this text message from my sister-in-law, Cait. Her and my brother Joel's wife, Crista, were scheming about his upcoming 30th birthday.

Well a few days later, I talked with Crista and she said that some friends and family were willing to chip in to buy a plane ticket for me to come "home" to Minnesota as a gift to Joel for his 30th birthday (happy birthday to me too, right?!). And then, a few days later, Crista asked if she got a few more people to chip in if I could bring Cece too. How could I say no? So, we purchased our plane tickets, and then, I didn't talk to my brother for two weeks as not to ruin the surprise. For those of you that don't know Joel, he's very intuitive. If I had talked to him on the phone, all I would have had to do was say, "hi, Joel", and he would have sensed something strange in my voice and likely would have asked, "Are you coming to Minnesota?" Thankfully, we didn't talk, and thankfully, Joel had no idea what his wife was planning for him!

On Thursday, August 29th, Cece and I began the flight across the ocean. We had a long layover in Chicago, and Cece was a trooper.

Cece and I arrived in Minnesota late Thursday night, the 29th of August. Rollie, Cait, and my mom picked us up at the airport. We had less than 24 hours to hide from Joel and keep our being there a secret. Joel's surprise party was planned for Friday night (his actual birthday is September 3rd). About 30 friends and family were planning to come to Rollie and Cait's house unbeknownst to Joel. His plan for that Friday night was to work on remodeling his kitchen, and we all knew he'd be annoyed about stopping that to "come to dinner" at Rollie and Cait's (a normal Friday night activity). Crista played it like a champ, and she acted annoyed at the invitation for dinner. So Joel and Crista begrudgingly headed to Rollie and Cait's for a very normal Friday night dinner, so Joel thought.

He never dreamed of what was waiting for him in a big box. Check out this video:


Joel's Birthday Surprise from Aleisha Stephens on Vimeo.

What a great present, huh? Cece said later that when it's her birthday, Joel needs to be wrapped in a box waiting to surprise her . . . we'll see.

Cece and I had the time of our lives for those few days in Minnesota.

And what about the boys? They stayed home with Daddy and ate ice cream!

I'm so glad Cece and I got to be at my brother's 30th birthday party.

a very green day

Yesterday, we had errands to run. We took all three kids to Hornbach, very similar to Home Depot, to get a few things, so we could finish some house projects. Though I can laugh now, I still cannot believe it happened.

Into Hornbach we go. Brian and I split up to maximize time. Brian asks me to work on getting paint, and he goes in search of caulk and possibly grout. Our plan is to paint our kitchen chairs and stools. I make a few rounds through the paint section. Brian has the cart and Cece, and I have the boys in the stroller. I run into Brian and Cece. We're discussing my findings. Then, Brian takes Alex in the stroller, and I take the cart which now has Gabe. Since Brian had the cart previously, I'm not sure what all is in there.

The paint department worker comes to me and asks me what I need, in Czech of course. Here goes! Thanks to my dad, I know that I need a good primer (he recommends Kilz, but I'm going to have a hard time translating that). I proceed to explain with some hand motions that I plan to paint chairs. He walks me around the paint section and shows me some options. I'm understanding most of what he's saying, and I'm feeling pretty good. I show him a color option that I'm interested in, and he tells me that he can mix it using a paint that would work well on wood (and says it's safe for kids). Great. I just need to pick the color. So, I push Gabe to the paint counter and park the cart. Cece is standing by Gabe. I'm working hard to understand more of what the guy is telling me while I'm trying to choose the right color.

Out of the corner of my eye, I can see that Gabe is holding some kind of bucket. I assume he's pulled it out of the cart and that it's something that Brian needs (possibly some kind of grout). I look back at my paint colors. Then, suddenly, the bucket slips out of Gabe's hand. Now, everything happens in slow motion. At the very same time that the bucket is falling, Brian is pushing Alex around the corner toward the cart. I see green paint splatter all over the floor! After the green paint hits the floor, it splatters all over Alex, the stroller, and Brian! I freeze. My brain cannot quite comprehend what has just happened. The paint department worker says a Czech phrase that unfortunately I understand completely!

Then, Alex starts crying. I go over to him to try to comfort him as Brian is asking me a lot of questions. "How did he get this paint?" I go from trying to tell Alex everything is going to be okay, to telling Brian that I have no idea where Gabe got the paint. A kind Czech women hands me five tissues. I say thank you (in Czech) and kind of look at the tissues and then at all the paint.

Brian says he's going to take Alex to the bathroom. I start saying I'm sorry in every possible way I know how (in Czech there are a few ways, and I still don't always know the best one to use when). I am trying to be helpful so I move the cart to try to block other customers from stepping in the paint. The paint guy has called for others to come clean up the mess; when they all arrive, I apologize again. They are very nice. One worker asks Cece what happened. Cece very clearly says in Czech, "my brother did it!"

Now, the painter man is asking me which color I want and how much. I have no idea. I'm standing next to a puddle of green paint, and I haven't had time to look very closely at the paint swatches, but I need to decide and get out of there. So, I choose a color and an amount. He mixes the paint. I apologize again, but then I remember that I still need varnish. The paint guy keeps helping me until I have everything I need. Seriously, he was so nice (he didn't smile, mind you, but he was nice).

Finally, I'm out of the paint department, and I go to find Brian and Alex. As Cece, Gabe, and I approach the Hornbach restrooms, we can hear crying. Oh, dear! Cece tells Brian that we are here to help. After a few minutes, he opens up the door, and there's Alex shirtless and dripping wet. His hair is slightly green. I ask him what happened, and he starts showing me all the paint. We clean him up as best we can and put his shirt back on.

On the way out of the store, Gabe, Alex, and I have a conversation. We like to verbally process things in our family.

Unfortunately, I think these clothes will always be green. What a day!